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Christmas from the Health and Safety guys.
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Don Offline
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Christmas from the Health and Safety guys.
Please be advised that all staff planning to dash through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh, going over the fields and laughing all the way are required to undergo a Risk Assessment addressing the safety of open sleighs. This assessment must also consider whether it is appropriate to use only one horse for such a venture, particularly where there are multiple passengers. Please note that permission must also be obtained in writing from landowners before their fields may be entered. To avoid offending those not participating in celebrations, we request that laughter is moderate only and not loud enough to be considered a noise nuisance.

Benches, stools and orthopaedic chairs are now available for collection by any shepherds planning or required to watch their flocks at night.

While provision has also been made for remote monitoring of flocks by CCTV cameras from a centrally heated shepherd observation hut, all facility users are reminded that an emergency response plan must be submitted to account for known risks to the flocks. The angel of the Lord is additionally reminded that prior to shining his/her glory all around s/he must confirm that all shepherds are wearing appropriate Personal Protective Equipment to account for the harmful effects of UVA, UVB and the overwhelming effects of Glory.

Following last year’s well publicised case, everyone is advised that The National Executive Committee has prohibited any comment with regard to the redness of any part of Mr. R. Reindeer. Further to this, exclusion of Mr. R Reindeer from reindeer games will be considered discriminatory and disciplinary action will be taken against those found guilty of this offence.

While it is acknowledged that gift-bearing is commonly practised in various parts of the world, everyone is reminded that the bearing of gifts is subject to Hospitality Guidelines and all gifts must be registered. This applies regardless of the individual, even royal personages. It is particularly noted that direct gifts of currency or gold are specifically precluded under provisions of the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act. Further, caution is advised regarding other common gifts, such as aromatic resins that may initiate allergic reactions.

Finally, in the recent case of the infant found tucked up in a manger without any crib for a bed, Social Services have been advised and will be arriving shortly.

Compliance of these guidelines is advised in order for you to fully participate with the festive spirit.

Cheers

Admin Risk Management Team

TVF tested battery info to be found here

[Image: 24291313393_16615b20b2_m.jpg]
22-12-2016 11:03 PM
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Don29palms Offline
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RE: Christmas from the Health and Safety guys.
Thank you P.C.P.! MERRY CHRISTMAS! 
(This post was last modified: 23-12-2016 04:45 AM by Don29palms.)
22-12-2016 11:34 PM
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Michael (12-23-2016)
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RE: Christmas from the Health and Safety guys.
Don29palms, while the greeting "Merry Christmas" may be tolerated in certain circles, it has come to the attention of the A.R.M.T. that this customary phrase may be considered inflammatory and/or offensive by certain persons not partaking in religious ceremonies this winter. As a result, we request that you and others be considerate of others and use the terms "Happy holidays" or "Happy solstice" in an attempt to minimize the risk of forcing others to feel uncomfortable due to the religious subtext of the phrase. Anyone found to be guilty of using the phrases "Merry Christmas," "Happy Hanukkah," "Happy Festivus," or any other greetings deemed inappropriate by the Petition of Underprivileged Social Systems In Every State committee will be quarantined to undergo reconditioning (and please, we're working on a new acronym and taking any suggestions). We hope you take no offense at this message. 
23-12-2016 04:36 AM
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Don29palms Offline
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RE: Christmas from the Health and Safety guys.
No offense taken. MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR! 
23-12-2016 04:41 AM
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